The holiday is just around the corner. Buying gifts especially to those people you know have everything they wanted already is the hardest task for me to do. What do you actually give a person who could easily buy or already own everything that they wanted? Besides the fact that I have limtited funds, what should I do? I was thinking of making something so it would be more personal but I'm so tired considering that I have 2 jobs right now. How about a nice card with the big bolded words, "I OWE YOU ONE!" Ha ha ha. I bet you they will be taking away their gifts for me in an instant. Working for a retail store makes me look at what most people are buying as gifts. You'll find the usual clothes, PS3, wii, shoes ... I always wonder what can be the most craziest gift that one person can give another? Well if you guys have a story please tell I would love to hear them. Happy Holidays!!!

A dozen of eggs, gallon of milk, celery, broccoli, papaya, apples, grapes, cereal, wheat bread..... This is how my grocery list looks like before I go to the store. But here I am unpacking the stuff and wondering what the hell did I buy. Soda, chips and dip, hotdogs, and all the snacks I can think off. Then to top that, I forgot the milk and the eggs. I swear I will not go grocery shopping when I am hungry. Sometimes I think I am prepared to stay away from the bad stuff but I always make excuses for myself like well I need snacks to keep me awake or when I have guests over I need to offer them something to eat. Ha ha ha ha pretty pathetic huh?!?. Well all I can say at least I have not gained back any of the 30 pounds that I lost so hopefully I will not screw it up.

Okay I remember putting gas and then placing my ATM Card on the back pocket of my jeans. Then a week has passed by and now I have washed and worn the jeans again but my ATM is no where insight. If you are asking me why the hell did I not notice that it was missing days ago? Well the answer to that is I have no idea? Luckily I have called my bank and there was no transactions done to my account. But just when I needed to take money out right now I have to travel all the way to my bank to get it which sucks cause that is an extra trip that I need to make.

Personal space

How big should your personal space be? I ask this question because I have somehow unconsciously placed an invisible barrier around me. Trust me this barrier is freakin big and anybody crossing that line will surely know that it made me really uncomfortable. I, myself, respect people's personal space and try to work around it. But now I have noticed that this barrier I placed on me maybe one reason why people think I am so not available. I am not and have never been a touchy feely person. I hardly give people even my own family an embrace when we see each other or when we go our separate ways. This have to change I understand that because I want to show people who are close to me that they mean a lot and every memory is treasured. Somehow I feel uncomfortable when people give me a peck on the chicks or even and embrace of appreciation. Is this because of my past? Is this my way of saying that I am emotionally damaged and have a hard time trusting again? I have no idea why I do that all I know that it makes me uncomfortable.

I am currently in a hibernating state of my life. The cold is getting to me. I try to do some of my chores after work but once I hit the bed all I wanna do is watch TV and lounge around. Even eating is not appealing to me right now. I just feel like I do not have energy to do much of anything. So many unfinished projects are laying around the floor taunting me to go through it but there I lay lifeless and hypnotized by the TV. I normally don't act this way. Sitting around unless it is in a coffee shop is more of what I prefer but somehow like I said I am so out of it. But trust me there are a lot of good shows on TV this season but is it really healthy to be just sitting there waiting for the next show until you eventually fall into a deep trance.